Margaret Jean
Asperger Me!
Category Archives: Aspies volunteering
Aspies: Ten Ways Volunteering Can Help Us Learn to Adapt.
When someone else changes plans which also affect us, as Aspies we may become temporarily stuck in a “this is unacceptable!” zone. How can we become more adaptable?
What activities or new experiences may best help us handle change so that we might adapt to other’s needs and acquire a healthier focus; one which does not lead us to a feeling of dread when we must deal with a changed agenda?
Save The Children’s Marc and Craig Kielburger give a possible solution in a recent newspaper article*:
“Youth who volunteer through our service programs…are more comfortable adapting to change…”
Renowned for creating the Save The Children Foundation as a young teen in high school, Craig Kielburger still operates the organization that was originally entirely run by and for children.
In their article, the Kielburger brothers note the following ten ways in whiuch volunteering helps teenagers adjust to school and other stresses, including aversion to change:
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When you do something for others, your stress levels are reduced. This is proven by research**.
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Volunteering may give you an alternative social scene, in which you can find a sense of community and belonging.
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Volunteering for a cause you’re passionate about will connect you with mentors who have similar interests.
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Helping others puts your focus outside of yourself, encouaging you to see your own situation in a different and possibly more positive light.
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Volunteering broadens your outlook. Your own problems may seem far less significant when you come face to face with the plight of others.
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Seeing other’s problems, Kielburger says, can help you build both perspective and empathy. Kielburger also notes that doctors state that empathy is a powerful antidote to stress.
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As a Volunteer you enjoy increased self-esteen. According to research done within the Foundation, volunteers for Save The Children are 1.3 times more likely to “have a strong sense of self”.
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The kind of stress found in volunteering — that is, helping others with their problems — can be an opportunity to overcome challenges, to build resiliency and to develop self-esteem.
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Volunteering can build leadership skills.
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Volunteering helps develop a life – long habit of giving back.
Find a cause you are passionate about, Aspies and get involved!
Maybe sorting clothes at the local hospice society thrift shop won’t do it for you, but perhaps volunteering in a Wildlife Preservation Society or starting up a chapter of Save the Children will.
Whatever you choose, if you give it your all you will find yourself thinking about situations, people and places beyond your own inner world. Go for it. And, most importantly, enjoy!
*According to an independent study by research firm Mission Measurement.
**See: https://www.randomactsofkindness.org/the-science-of-kindness
Yours truly,
Margaret Jean.
Aspies: Five Ways To Lower Anxiety
What is the difference between anxiety and fear? I’ve heard it said that fear is a specific dread–for instance, you might be afraid of the man next door because you have heard he’s a pervert or because he always looks angry.
Anxiety on the other hand is the dread you experience but can’t explain. You might be having fearful feelings but not be able to say why. This is very challenging because not knowing where the fear comes from, means you have no way to face down the fear.
But relax. There is help. And I know we’ve talked about this before, but with more than fifty percent of 100,000 college students* rating anxiety as their biggest issue when visiting a campus clinic, and the Canadian Anxiety Disorder Association stating that anxiety is now the number one mental health problem in Canada, this information bears repeating.
So here is help: Five ways to fight anxiety and come out a winner.
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At the end of each day, think of three things that went right. Focus your thoughts on those incidents. Did you hand a report in, and get a good mark? Did someone compliment you? Did you finally make that phone call you’ve been dreading to make? Did you balance your budget? Smile at someone who smiled back at you? How did you make that happen?
For more on the power of positive thinking from Michigan University see: https://www.uofmhealth.org/node/651843
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Be grateful. Think about something you have–your health, your living space, your cat,–and be thankful for it. It can be something as simple as a beautiful day, or rain for your garden or the sun on your face. Feeling and expressing gratitude leads to reduced anxiety. For more information about this topic see: https://www.bphope.com/bipolar-buzz/10-ways-to-use-the-power-of-gratitude-to-help-depression-anxiety/
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Be kind. Doing a good deed doesn’t just lift the spirits of the recipient of your kindness; it somehow magically transforms something inside of us to a good emotion+. And here’s the great thing–it doesn’t matter if you save someone from getting hit by a train (very anxiety producing in itself!) or if you just say hello to the lonely senior living down the street–it’s all powerful anti-anxiety medicine.
To learn more see: https://www.springer.com/gp/about-springer/media/research-news/all-english-research-news/doing-good-deeds-helps-socially-anxious-people-relax/679444
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Volunteer: think of some charity you’d like to lend a helping hand to, then go and sign up as a volunteer. You’ll meet people with similar interests, see that you are better off than some people, and possibly make new friends. At the very least you’ll have social contact and feel productive.
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Be compassionate to yourself. Forgive yourself your blunders. Tell yourself you’ve learned something from that embarrassing situation and will do better next time. try to see the humour in it, and understand that you are loveable, you are unique and you are worthy of happiness.
*From a Penn State University study. Read more at: http://news.psu.edu/story/343727/2015/02/05/research/annual-report-offers-snapshot-us-college-students%E2%80%99-mental-health
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Margaret Jean 